The Jace Letters
by Karen Funk Blocher
© 2006 by KFB
Subject: Re: Einstein and Stuff
Date: 5/??/??? 24r027098wieh
I was wondering when you would ask for proof, not that I'm exactly in a good position to give you any. How about this?
Birthday Presents from Me to You
* Age 6: a stuffed poodle on a pillow. Do you still have that? Seems to me I remember seeing it in your closet the last time you gave me "the Tour."
* Age 7: Scrabble Junior.
* Age 8: I can't remember...oh, yes. A necklace maker. I must have spent an hour in Toys R Us that time, trying to figure out what you'd like.
* Age 9: a diary with an audio feature and a lock.
* Age 10: a set of acrylic paints and an artist's tablet.
* Age 11: if I'd actually managed to get to Los Alamos, I would have given you a box set of the BBC Narnia movies on DVD. They're here with me. Since you're not likely to get these, I've been watching them. If it's really 2006, that means the Disney version came out. Was it any good?
I trust that establishes my identity.
On the name thing: my goodness, Jace, don't you know how incredibly cool your nickname is? At least it is from my point of view. You may remember that I was there when you told your parents to start calling you Jace instead of Janice. That was a gutsy thing for a seven-year-old to do. I thought your mother would be upset, but then your dad laughed, and I knew they'd go along with it. You have cool parents!
As for "Jace Face the Space Case," I thought you liked Jace Face. That is your screen name, after all. Is it really the "space case" part that bothers you, or is it because these kids are trying to be mean? The heck with them. If there's one thing I regret most about my childhood, junior high and high school years,, it's that I let whatever everyone else said and did hurt my feelings. YOU know you're not a "space case," and these kids probably know it, too. They're just going for the rhyme. You can even come up with a positive interpretation of "space case" if you try.
Heck, it's not remotely as bad as being saddled with the name "Sandy Sheets." "Hey, Sandy! How about washing those sheets?" "What were you doing in those sheets to make them sandy?" I was called Sandy Bottoms, and Sandy Pandy, and Sandy Sh*ts, and Sandy Feets, and even Candy Beets! I didn't handle it very well. Don't make that mistake. You've got a really good name, but absolutely every name can be turned into a joke or insult if you work at it. If some jerks at school try that on you, don't give them the satisfaction of being hurt by it. It's their problem, not yours. And a lot of times, as I learned many years later, teasing isn't meant to hurt. You can choose to enjoy the joke, instead of being scarred by it as I was.
So, it's past midnight by my watch,and I'm tired and sore. If I go to bed, does that mean you'll be 13 or 14 or 22 years old when I wake up in the morning? Gabby came through here a few minutes ago, and I asked her about the Einstein twin paradox and your theory about me. She didn't really answer the question, but she smiled. I think she was genuinely pleased to hear that it was you who came up with that. Make of that what you will: I have no clue.
Aunt Sandy (really!)